5 Ways To Build a Relationship With Yourself

You have probably heard the quote: “love yourself first!” Or “In order to love others, start loving yourself first.” Those are just a few because they are many inspirational quotes about self-love. In order to love yourself, you need to know yourself. This sounds pretty obvious, but this really means to know yourself on a deeper level, understanding your strengths and weaknesses, your passions and fears, etcetera. Once you go deep into yourself as an individual, you will be able to evaluate how much you like yourself. Building a relation with yourself and practicing self love is the first act of kindness and there are some proven ways to help you achieve this that will lead you to overall happiness and well being.

1. Write a Letter to Yourself

This exercise is meant to take time out of your day to write down your thoughts on paper and ultimately practice love, believe me, the results are totally worth it. It can sound complicated but it’s easier than you think, you basically need to write anything important about yourself and create awareness of your strengths and ideas by expressing what is truly in your mind. For example, do you need to make a decision on something in particular, but are still questioning the best choice? What I normally do is write the options down, which always helps me to have both scenarios in front of me and allow me to analyze them so I can make better choices. It’s important to prioritize your feelings, write all the things you love about yourself and the things you are not so crazy about, along with some possible options to improve those specific things, visualizing yourself in a whole new positive way.

2.Practice Positive Self-Talk Everyday

After you’ve taken some time to think about the things you wrote down for yourself, make some effort to replace anything negative that you said about yourself with something that is positive. Don’t define yourself through negatives, you have to choose adjectives. Talk about your abilities. Tell yourself that you can accomplish your goals. The more that you repeat these things, the more possible they become.  Manifest all the good things and they will eventually come. ( this can sound a little hippy-dippy but it’s the way it is and it works! It never hurts to try ) The positive impact that having a positive life can have on you is huge.

3.Stop Focusing on the Dealings of Others 

Some of the worst distractions or ways to waste your time, is by getting involved with those that spend too much time focusing on and critiquing the lives of others. It can be extremely easy to fall into the habit of spending your time and energy concerning yourself with the movements of others, and you may even spend time discussing these things with others, but it’s important to note that while you’re focusing on others, you’re avoiding work that you can be doing on yourself. 

Another side of this is that constantly comparing yourself might be a manifestation of insecurities that you feel towards yourself. It’s a fact that one of the questions that have ruined more dreams than anything in the world is: what are people going to say? And this always limits yourself to do things and follow your dreams, because this will create insecurities. The person who is aware of the nuances of how you feel would be you because people can’t read the minds of others. If you feel as though you are constantly scrutinized by others, it’s important to remember that they might not even be aware that you feel any discomfort at all. Most of the time, people are primarily focused on how they are seen by others.

4.Take Time to Help Someone in Need

There are few joys that can compare to the feeling you get when you help someone who really needs it. It fuels your soul! When you’ve been spending a lot of time focusing on yourself in unhealthy ways, a really good way to break out of that is also to help someone else. This puts them in the forefront of your mind for a time, and this can help you to appreciate the situation that you have as well. 

For example, you can get involved in helping the homeless and elderly, both are in constant need of volunteers that can help dilute the strain placed on other people who are already busy in the community. You might be surprised by the outpouring of gratitude that comes from people who aren’t used to getting the help that you’re providing. This can create connections and inspire the future success of people who might not have had the opportunity otherwise. 

5.Learn to Forgive People 

It’s really hard to create a better relationship with yourself when you carry a lot of baggage from past dealings with people. But keep in mind that no matter how bad a certain person was or the bad in a situation, the past is just past and it’s gone, unfortunately, there’s no way to change it. The future, instead, is yet to come and you can create a better future, so focus on that. Things sometimes happen that can make you feel a little bit sour about having relationships with others but it’s important to remember that you don’t need to hold onto these things. Let them just be things that happened and move on. It’s been said that forgiving people is more about being healthier for yourself rather than for the person you’re forgiving. This is because holding onto anger and pain will only cause you to feel negatively about a lot of other things in your life. 

Once you have forgiven someone completely, the part of your mind that has been holding onto those toxic thoughts and feelings will be free to focus on better things. You can use that brainpower to think of ways to put good things into the world around you. There are a lot of ways to spread positivity, and the best way is to do something good for others.

Wishing you all the best and sending you all my love!